French DM Novel

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Misskarna
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 4-May-17 01:44

Yeah Clodius, Chaos changed the Dungeon, into a more complexed dungeon in Chaos Strikes Back, hence why there would be 2 different entrances and the story continues in DMJava as the fire staff was destroyed, this happens 1000 years later a Demon rises to power to try and bring him back, I don't know full story as only got to level 4 so far, the dungeon is pretty tough without characters with CSB HP :P

Incase you wanted to include that in your story, as I know you stuck to DM lore and world whereas my story uses it own world that I am making up as I go along.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 4-May-17 03:04

CSB is a very complex dungeon indeed. Yes, I remember to have been lost many times in its multi level labyrinths years ago :? . I had big challenge to map it.
What I am trying to keep from the original DM when I draw the champions is the signature that the creators gave to them; I want to evolve the champions just a bit but not too much.
It is essential if I want to create a story before the original DM game. It is hard sometime to stay on the right track and not giving them a modern look. For some who looked at my several update with Daroou and Gothmog, their first look were too different and I had to step back.

For those whom that interests, my French novel is almost finished :D . A chapter is in process of translation and will be posted soon here in the forum. Hoping that the English version will reflect the idea original.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 4-May-17 04:51

Oh that is so cool that you wrote the story before the game I will love to read the English version :-)

My story is still a massive work in progress and its focused on first journey into the dungeon where Chaos gets returned to Balance. I have done up to treasure stores so far and working my way through there. I have written literally 249 pages so far and 84608 word just to start exploring first treasure stores room, so much detail has gone into this. I may need cut some out, some people like the detail and some don't like too much, its finding that balance.

I made sure the party is not invincible they interact like 4 people would and I am adding a layer of drama soon on Skeleton level to make it more fun. my first book will finish at the tomb once the realize they cannot reach the staff as they need more ra-keys. I also made them not allowed to use spell unless they know the Runes and spell combinations.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 5-May-17 00:17

@ Misskarna,

The beginning of my story is not a secret since I already posted a few resumes at the top of this topic. The scoop is I started in 2010 a story inside the dungeon like you. (Lets call this one 'The end' for now)I had reached 222 pages and 88081 words. It's after I found your beatiful work that I changed my mind. In 2013, I put it aside and decided to rewind before DM.

Tome 1: Halk will be forceed to leave his home in the west mountains to an unknown region folded by a war (refer you to the world map). He will meet many dangers through his journey to the mount Anaias. Other main characters involved are Nabi, Alex, (Syra who gave me lots of headach) and Zed's army. I included also a few more champions as they acted only a little role in the story to prepare a sequel to the first one.

I know what you mean about massive work :shock: Tome 1 has reached 237 pages and 108843 words... in French or course.
Tome 2 will start in the north and east of the map.

Misskarna said:
I also made them not allowed to use spell unless they know the Runes and spell combinations.
Respect the game's rules. I love it. :D
When my tome 1 will be done, I assure you that I will read your story :wink:
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 5-May-17 18:13

Hi...
@ clodius - really like your map here:
https://www.flickr.com/photos/100604938 ... 810588163/
Could I take some inspiration from this map and use it to set my dungeon in? Currently have this map, as created by the excellent donjon software...
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C_FHHeSXYAAlxYv.jpg:large
https://donjon.bin.sh/world/
Like the rendering, but thought why not try and tie into your map a bit more - not as if we'll ever get all our worlds aligned, but why not at least make some things similar. appreciate though you might not want to share :D

Also, @ Misskarna:
reading youre stories, woudl it be fair to say that your main characters are something like this?
Karna = mix sonja + chani, black hair, light brown eyes - fighter, sword and shield
Rheill = mix halk + zed , brown hair, hazel eyes = platemail, 2h sword
Sana = mix syra + leyla , blonde hair, blue eyes, cloak, robe = wizard, staff
Isai = mix elijah + mophus, black short hair, dark eyes, full beard, grey priest robes = monk, sceptre

just curious, as I like the characters and thinking someday might even feature them in my game, if that's ok :)

either way, I love what you are doing... :D
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 6-May-17 00:31

Never really thought about it as I did not use the characters at all from the Original, I came up with these as they look great and I always love fighting with swords and shields so Karna resembles myself, but those descriptions fit perfectly!

Glad you like the story, its really fun to write. I have be careful though because i know the dungeon I have to try and make seem like I don't know where I am going, but also I dont want have write too much backtracking either, so I am using a balance in the story-telling.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 6-May-17 00:36

After all this time, thanks God someone has answered my prayers :D.
YES you can use whatever you want. This is why I build this huge Map. It’s for everyone. Give me your suggestions to finish it. I did all this by instinct without knowing what I was talking about. I never played with other dungeon games than DM and CSB. As you can see, I found some nice pictures and I tried to adapt them in the field. There is still a lot to do. Give me some advices and I will try to complete the blanks. What you dislike or poorly done. Tell me where you want to see your own dungeon. Describe me the exterior of your dungeon and I will draw your entrance. There is enough place for all custom dungeon… if not, I will make some place :wink:.

Anyone else?
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 6-May-17 01:00

Also, @ Misskarna:
reading youre stories, woudl it be fair to say that your main characters are something like this?
Karna = mix sonja + chani, black hair, light brown eyes - fighter, sword and shield
Rheill = mix halk + zed , brown hair, hazel eyes = platemail, 2h sword
Sana = mix syra + leyla , blonde hair, blue eyes, cloak, robe = wizard, staff
Isai = mix elijah + mophus, black short hair, dark eyes, full beard, grey priest robes = monk, sceptre

just curious, as I like the characters and thinking someday might even feature them in my game, if that's ok :)
Ah I wasn't sure if he was asking me about the chars in my story, you can use them in your game, if you meant using my descriptions, I wanted edit that post, but I couldn't :-)

PS Also I added a post to dmjava custom dungeons as working on a dm3 dungeon, editor is quite easy to learn, and it helps making basic stuff first since that's how I want my dungeon it helps you learn how to get more complexed. Lot of people make that mistake with editors and try to do something so complicated first lol, seen it a lot on log forums.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 6-May-17 03:56

Keep telling the stories

skoal :o
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 6-May-17 16:12

Cool - thanks to both of you

@ clodius - let me see if I can re-render my map to match your terrain and city names. I do like the 'Tolkein' rendering style of that donjon map, so might try something like that.
@ misskarna - cool: I'll see if I can put something together sometime, ;). also spotted this:http://www.nexusmods.com/grimrock/mods/346/? - so, going by this, look forward to your DM3, :)
@ all: I did previously try to write a prequel to DM in RTC (back in 2008), but hit a lot of storytelling snags. I do love DM and Grimrock, but the storytelling aspect has always been very difficult for me to work through.
(I am much less 'epic-crawl', much more 'swashbuckle' - so the first-person setting is an issue for me on this point). PS: I have seen great examples however that get around this, so it is just my preference, btw - don't hate me for it ;)

So hope you guys have more success in your chosen formats! :)
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 7-May-17 02:32

oh yes I never finished that dungeon, I ran out of time as LOG2 came out and had to start over as all scripting changed. Also LOG was limiting me as I couldn't figure out to code quick pits, and stuff like that, I prefer dm as pits are actually hidden, where grimrock you can see them so you know they most likely could open if you saw a trap door and an alcove. Ill do Java first as its close to original.

I think I did quite a few floors though on that dungeon, I also remade Knightmare for LOG 1, which is fully completed, but you cannot duplicate switch puzzles as you cannot twist the dungeon like you can in Java by removing the walls and putting them back. Also I didnt know the combination there, only the solution someone with a mad brain figured it out somehow. it was a crazy puzzle 4 switches, some would turn the dungeon but only if certain ones were on and you had make 2 places go straight.

looks like I did add an a beta ending sort of so it should be completable until then

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 8-May-17 07:03

LOG was great but didn't get on well with LOG2. Only managed one map myself http://bit.ly/2qgcHME- which was fun to do - and did manage to do one room in the ORRR2 thing - happy days. But LOG2... bleh. I'll get back into it one day... But first, I'll see if I can finally beat your map (once I've completed about 6 other projects!).

Anyway, sorry, completely off-topic for what you guys were posting! I'll come back with draft artwork for these things first (ie: soon)
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 8-May-17 14:07

@misskarna ... given the limitations of my upcoming submission (it's retro!)... here's a link to the party https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C_TxW43XkAAuRXQ.png
let me know if this is a reasonable representation. :)
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 10-May-17 02:42

Very nice pictures... love them. I did not know you were so talented in drawing :D .
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 10-May-17 14:39

LOL. I am using this fine program to create a base for a world-map. https://donjon.bin.sh/fantasy/world/
It has the option to add randon placenames... so agreed out of curiosity, and this came up:
Image
Nice to see Dungeon Master's most-popular character given a home at last. :D

They must have this name in their DB somewhere... :) so another DM influence.
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Gambit37 » 10-May-17 15:28

Gothmog is actually a character from Tolkien, that's where FTL nicked it from ;-)

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 11-May-17 01:49

Dave that's pretty good, Please use that :-)

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by boyflea » 12-May-17 22:51

Gothmog was really from Tolkein? I have lived and learned. :)


ok, so have drafted my map here:
Full-size here:
http://orig09.deviantart.net/2fe1/f/201 ... b8zw00.png

Preview:
Image

That was such fun to do - :) well, hope you like it. I'm sure there are other towns etc that could have been included, but it feels authentic-ish. :)
The stonework walls were pristine, the floor level, the waterworks and drains complete. The lighting network was in and the Dragon in the basement was grumpily heating the water-pipes: Lord Chaos consulted the blueprints again, looking for the bathroom.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 13-May-17 17:21

Nice, curious about the -ish Dave.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Seriously Unserious » 28-Jun-17 17:20

Wow, you really did a great job with the map, boyflea.

@Claudius, In my absence you've really progressed with your story. Looking forward to reading the English translation when you get it all done.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 9-Aug-18 17:10

Hi everyone,
I did a little progress in my French DM story since my white page with Syra and pretty satisfied the way it goes. I can give you a teaser soon. I think the chapter 4 with Nabi will be a good one. Because I am not perfectly bilingual, it's only a literal translation that is slowly underway and has not been tweaked, so don't judge it too hard.
I also completed one portion of my DM World Map that shows a partial path where Halk went through. I will refresh my link soon.

Maybe I am misunderstanding...
I downloaded Theron’s Quest for RTC yesterday and played for the 1st time to see how it’s look like. It seems to me that it is more a test then a prequel to DM but I must respect the timeline of this game. I think it’s appended around a year before DM. In the first maze I visited, I recognized same designs, same traps and off course same monsters from DM. I was interested more about the story behind the game then the game itself. The intro tells that Chaos and his Cult of Deaths were behind it but I did not saw him. At the beginning, the story gives a few clues about the castle of Ya-Brodin that I can use in the story. I did not finish the game and went directly to the end scenery. I questioned myself about what does append to Theron after he won that challenge. Where goes the seven black Taza pieces armor that Theron retrieved from these 7 mazes? The armor is it exposed somewhere? I would like to mention it in my story. The scenes at the end showed a magic reconstruction of the castle. What is the name of that castle? Is it Ya-Brodin? If it is, I think I don't have to show the castle like ruin. I found some interesting thing. I though Theron was not so innocent after all when he started DM.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 10-Aug-18 13:49

Hi Clodius_one

Wow, you found some time to post a message, so happy to see that. I never played Theron's Quest, I remember a dungeon having to move around chests but from your description this isn't the same dungeon. Keep plugging at it. I have read some of your story a few times now, each time progressing as though I can see the story unfold in the dungeon map universe, it's a great piece of work. I know how in depth and detailed you are with it, can't wait to when it is finished.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Misskarna » 10-Aug-18 18:47

Sounds like have you done a lot of work on the Novel. Sometimes it can be best to just create your own world. Thats what I did with my story I made my own continent and mentioned some of the lands overseas. I will go into more detail in Book 2 on the lands though to keep the story fresh as they get into lower depths of the dungeon I got a huge plot twist near the end of the story too, which I kind of teased around chapter 20/21 in Book 1.

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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 16-Aug-18 13:12

It's difficult to develop in a fantasy world with less experience. When I focus on some details, I think my vision of things is not right. I don't know if it will be appreciate. Sometime I wish to share ideas and vision from others DM fans. But in overall, I like the way I went. It's easy for me to dive in my character's eyes and see their environment. The positive point is I can modify any part of the story or the World Map anytime as needed because only a few people already read it.

@ Misskarna, I salute your courage to post your story as soon as you write a chapter :)
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 16-Aug-18 13:39

Just keep plugging at it Clodius_one, it goes in spurts. I look forward to the fall and winter, lots to work on. I am currently retraining and honing my skills with GIMP, much has changed with it so expect results this winter, provided there are no more awful surprises. I think if other DM fans speak up a little more it just could spark a little flame, we'll see.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 12-Sep-18 17:45

Hello everyone,

After revising a lot, I finally have a draft copy to give you. :D

Chapter 4

A hurried departure

South of the mount Anaias, past the village of Viborg on the other side of a dense forest, a humble monastery was sitting regally on the hillside. Spared from ravages of war, it was surrounded by two acres of grounds, the front and from both sides bordering its domain, was peaceful. Behind, was a gentle slope down to the river, where a one hundred twenty foot boat was moored to a dock. There were men working to unload the supplies on the dock for the needs of the homestead. This monastery shone more from its humanitarianism than its appearance. Built fifty years ago, it took a hundred men to put together the compound on two floors. With its two wings on each side, the residence was U-shaped made in a contemporary style out of solid oak, was a proof that certain craftsman, when they used their strength and creatively, could turn inhospitable ground into a beautiful landmark. With a dozen employees, some of whom were busy harvesting produce daily. There were workers helping those in need who lived in the wings of that were repurposed for this new task.

This would all be impossible without the largesse of a simple man. Long before finding this prosperous and respected position, on the other part of his life, Nabi was a great traveller. He went around the world in pursuit of new experiences. On one of his last trips, he saw an impressive man who could make fire with his empty hands. He met this person and was happy to have good affinity with him. Nabi spent three years in his company. The magician introduced him into the domain of black magic. Nabi found out that he was receptive to the lessons and learned first how to create light in the dark. His explorations brought him to the discovery of the simple magic fire; Nabi developed the ability to make a small flame in his palm. With practice, he gradually was able to make the flame grow and turn into a ball that he could throw in front of him. This period of his life brought him to have bad encounters and for his own sake, he had to use magic to defend himself. Not stable in his frequentations, he was forced to move out often to escape the danger. He found himself caught in many dangerous altercations. If not for his deep knowledge of magic, he would no longer be in this world. One day, the magician found him gravely injured and brought him to cure.

After his convalescence, Nabi was still interested to learn. The good magician taught him another facet of magic. It was much more serene than he was acquainted with. This made Nabi able to use his powers for good and healing of beings. He started to experiment with potions and acquired an intermediate level of magic abilities.

Nabi had turned sixty-five years after having impressive experiences in magic. His body was no longer young therefore, he walked with a staff. The magician noticed this and because that he possessed magic runes, this made him able to make objects magical. Upon Nabi’s departure from his apprenticeship, he made his staff magic that increases a bit the Mana of the holder. Mana is the energy source of magic used for casting. After a long period of apprenticeship spent accompanying the magician, Nabi followed the path of peace and decided to return to his village of his birth, his familial domain. He never heard again from the good magician who taught him so much and brought him on the straight road.

It was in July, when Nabi finally returned home. He discovered his parents were in poor health. He moved into the second floor of one of the wings of the compound and soon after, he chose a space for his laboratory. Putting his magical knowledge to work, he made them potions for healing. Unfortunately, they were not strong enough. The potions soothed their pain and helped them sleep, but did not heal them. He researched nonstop to find new formulas that would be more potent. One day, he had to accept that he had arrived too late and the pain had overtaken them. His efforts were wasted and the sickness of his parents succumbed to their illness.

Upon the passing of his parents, he built a burial plot for his family behind the large residence and he interred his parents. He felt overwhelmed; he did nothing for a month. In this period of mourning, he prayed continually that god should guide his parent’s souls to heaven.

A little while after their passing, Nabi inherited the family compound and more than enough money to live his simple life. He didn't know what to do with all this wealth. Since his return to his birthplace, he had started sitting on the side of the main road and listening to the people telling their stories and even asking him for advice about their daily struggles. He was nicknamed the Prophet. It fascinated him to hear all these stories, so that is why he came back each time to listen to them. This became a real life experience for him.

One day, he had a moment of intuition regarding what he should undertake; God had finally shown him his path. Nabi decided to open his homestead for the needs of the poor. He dedicated one wing of his home to the homeless offering them a bed and breakfast. He gave them spiritual guidance in order to restore balance to their lives. The second wing he turned into a center for healing with his laboratory on the second level. Nabi lived happily in his domain of God.

Yesterday, a gravely injured man was brought to Nabi for urgent care. This morning he could happily leave and be on his way. Today Nabi could clean his operating room on the second floor. Climbing the stairs became more difficult for him. He was thinking of this spring when he would reach seventy years old. His body started showing its age and weakness. He needed his staff to walk. Life goes this way.

At the end of the morning, Nabi had finished sterilizing his instruments and taking inventory of his potions of health. He rinsed several empty vials with water and put them upside down on a rack to dry. He took several dry vials and read their labels concentrating one of them. He was casting a spell when he heard the door of laboratory creak open.

‘‘Sorry father Nabi for disturbing you…’’

Nabi was in the middle of casting a spell and could not answer immediately because he didn’t want to lose his potion.

‘‘We have more people that have arrived at the entrance’’ He said. ‘‘A mother and her two children. I don’t know where to put them.’’

At last, Nabi was done casting his spell. A cloud appeared in his small vial and it was filling with blue liquid. Satisfied, he turned to his visitor.

‘‘Bring them to the second floor if you please Barnabe.’’

‘‘But father Nabi, we are already at maximum capacity.’’

Barnabe was hired by the family to take care of the domain by Nabi way before he spent his time to travel. He called him father when since he saw what the old man does for the homeless.

‘‘The gravely injured in room four that we admitted last week has unfortunately passed away last night. Tell Florence to take care of the room.’’

‘‘God rest his soul’’ says Barnabe. It seems that all the survivors of the villages in ruins; women, children, and old men have left their homes to take refuge here, he exclaimed just before closing the door.

Nabi heard the negative remark and wanted to quickly interject and correct it.

‘‘We do not speak this way Barnabe. The world is going through a very difficult time at the moment. The less fortunate need us. My house of god will always be open for lost souls.’’

‘‘Yes father, forgive me father’’ he said feeling embarrassed from being corrected by his master. He crossed himself just before leaving.

‘‘Barnabe had a good point’’ thought. Nabi paused to reflect and pray.

‘‘Omnipotent God, we have so little space for all these people in distress. This is not that I want to complain about the task that you have assigned me father. I would really appreciate some exterior assistance as we are getting overwhelmed… Amen.’’

Early in the afternoon, Florence readied the dining room for meal. Two large rooms were ready to greet the residents before they go to the tables. In the front of the residence in the lobby, Nabi sat at his small desk. He was busy writing his next order: sheets and blankets for the residents in the East wing; Two barrels of salt, four barrels of sugar and ten sacks of flour for the kitchen. He also ordered new tools for gardening to replace the old broken ones.

He raised his eyes from his order book and noticed out of the window, a troubling column of smoke from afar rising above the treetops. This intrigued him. It seemed that a camp was established right in the middle of the forest. Everyone in the region knew of the situation of mount Anaias. From the hideous monsters lurking all night around this mountain, the Duke of Banville’s army was doing everything in his power to eliminate them. Since the recent column of smoke emanating from the peak of mountain, nobody had risked their life to cross the forest. The road that went east to west and turn around the mountain was well maintained. It was guarded by soldiers to facilitate movement of travelers.

‘‘I wonder who would be crazy enough to go through the forest with all this going on.’’

Nabi evaluated its position of about two-thirds of his domain and wished secretly that nothing wrong is coming.

After dinner, Nabi proceeded to visit the east wing, to check the status of his patients. He thanked God that there were no gravely injured at this time. Late in the evening, he was completely exhausted when he finally reaches his room on the second floor at the front side of the house. He sat at his desk to write down the status of his patients. Then he blew out the flame of the lamp. He threw a final glance out the window above the treetops before he went to sleep. It was too dark to see anything outside.

‘‘Help! Have mercy!’’

During the night, Nabi was suddenly awakened by noises and screams. He sat up in his bed in the dark part of his room. He saw bright orange lights coming from the window and flickering like snakes on the ceiling of his bedroom. He heard the growling of a wild animal from outside. He thought it was probably a wolf that had come out of the forest. This happened sometimes, Nabi walked barefoot to the window to see what was going on. The scene he saw was terrifying; a dark intruding army carrying sticks and torches, was coming out of the Woods and running all over the ground of his homestead. They had set fire to his two apple trees and his veranda in front of the residence. A dark mass under his window was savagely beating something on the ground. Then it turned in his direction and Nabi saw an abomination from hell. It looked like a troll and had slaughtered one of his gardeners. He quickly gestured instinctively. Nabi lift his palm of his hand towards the horrible monster and cast a spell.

‘‘Lo Ful Ir!’’

Unfortunately, nothing happened.

‘‘Maybe it was just a lack of practice’’ He said to himself. ‘‘It had been so long since I had cast this kind of spell.’’

His mana was already drained. Nabi needed to recharge. He grabbed his magic staff and hid from view. He closed his eyes for a moment and relaxed. He looked back out the window again. The troll had turned in his direction. There was no doubt, the troll had heard him. Nabi recast the spell in a low voice. Sparks encircled his wrist and the ball of fire he had desired was launched downwards. He hit the monster with full force and it was crawling on the ground. Nabi relight the lamp on his night table. He put his sandals on before going out in the hallway yelling.

‘‘Alert! Wake up everybody, we're under attack!’’

Finally, some doors to the rooms opened up and faces appeared drawn by his cries.

‘‘What is happening father Nabi? ’’ Asked Barnabe half-asleep.

‘‘We have been attacked; wake everyone up quietly and wait for me at the foot of the outside stairs. We shall leave all together. Florence, you are responsible of the east wing, Simon, you take care of the west wing.

‘‘Oh my God!’’ Cried Florence anxiously. ‘‘Who is attacking us?’’

‘‘Silence! Not so loud, I do not have the time to explain. Do as I say, quickly. Florence and Simon, wake up everybody. Barnabe, you come with me.’’

Suddenly, we heard loud noises on the front door.

‘‘Fortunately, it was made of thick oak.’’ Nabi told to himself. ‘‘It should slow them down for a little while.’’

Nabi headed in the east wing, with Barnabe and Florence, while Simon ran towards the west wing. Nabi entered in his laboratory while Florence was opening doors that were still closed and waking those who still asleep.

‘‘Barnabe, takes this bag and put the vials from the work table in it. They will be important for our escape.’’

‘‘Our escape!’’ Exclaimed Barnabe surprised. I thought we were just going to hide in the basement. ’’

‘‘Think about it. We cannot hide indefinitely. It would not take the intruders long to find us.’’

‘‘But where will we go?’’ Asked Barnabe.

‘‘To the boat, Barnabe, if we get a chance. We will flee on the river.’’

Loud cracking noises came from the wood of the main entry of the residence. Nabi understood that the doors were starting to give way.

‘‘Come on, let’s go! We have nothing else to do here. We can’t stay here much longer. It's becoming too dangerous.’’

Nabi put his magic scrolls spells in the bag that he took with a shoulder strap and headed towards the back of the residence where there are stairs that lead to the outside. Suddenly noises came from the bottom of the stairs and rose to their ears.

‘‘Silence! Do not go down there! Our escape route is blocked. Come with me!’’

Nabi led them towards another staircase. He listened carefully in that staircase before he gives his escape’s instruction.

‘‘This one is safe. Go down to the basement, said Nabi in a low voice. Hurry up and be silent!’’

They heard a dreadful noise that was coming from the main floor. Nabi was the last to go down the stairs when a horrible monster appeared at the other end of the corridor. It was smashing all the furniture that was flying in pieces. It stopped and made a bestial scream. Assuming the monster had not seen him yet; Nabi quickly blew out the candle and laid it gently on the ground. Nabi went down the steps of stones as quickly as he could in the dark. He thought that he had disappeared in the eyes of the intruder. The beast hesitated for a moment but it would not be fooled for long. The beast smelled them. It let out another guttural cry and started charging in his direction. Nabi was half way down the stairs when he heard the beast at the top of the stairs sniffing the air. He held his breath. Their smell was masked with the smoke from the extinguished candle. The lamp got thrown violently in the stairwell and it smashed against the stone wall. Shards of glass rained at his feet but the monster did not come down. When Nabi reached the basement, it was dimly lit with a few flickering torches, He saw about fifty people half-dressed and terrorized.

‘‘Have no fear good people, he murmured; God will take care of saving our souls.’’ He added in order to reassure them. ‘‘This way, follow me.’’

Nabi passed in front of Barnabe and under the fascinated eyes of the people. He dragged his hand on the top of the wall of the basement cold and humid along the dark corridor.

‘‘Father Nabi, what are you doing? We need to find a way out... my father.’’

‘‘Patience Barnabe.’’ Replied Nabi.

He did not remember where to find what he was looking for until he arrived at the end of the wall. His hand brushed a lever on top of the wall. He grabbed it firmly and pulled it down. Under the gaze of the people with him, at the end of the corridor, a part of the wall slid open, revealing an underground passage.

‘‘Come all my friends. This passage will lead us to the chapel safely.’’

Stunned, Barnabe shot him an inquisitive look.

‘‘After my parents had acquired this property and began to do renovations, I found this hidden underground passage behind a poorly built wall.’’ Nabi said as he guided his community of people through the dark passage.

‘‘It was probably an emergency escape then we just improved it.’’

‘‘But you said the chapel did not exist when the residence was rebuilt from the ashes.’’ Said Barnabe.

‘‘There was surely something here in this place. The ground had traces of ancient construction. Maybe a war or a major fire destroyed the residence, but the tunnel, stayed intact. We built a hatch at the exit of the tunnel, behind the altar.’’

Beside Barnabe and Nabi, all the escapees had gone in the underground passage. Suddenly, from the light of the lamps on the walls, emerged a large shadow fell over the corridor’s walls by the foot of the stairs. Behind them and then there was a growl and a troll appeared. Nabi cast a new spell of fire, hoping he had recovered enough magical mana.

‘‘Lo Ful Ir.’’

He shot a fireball that just missed. The fireball had reached a part of the wall over him. A big stone came loose and fell on the monster’s foot, holding him captive. It moaned in pain.

‘‘Run Barnabe! I will try to hold this troll back.’’

‘‘But Sir, you are powerless against this monster.’’

‘‘Do as I told you, Barnabe. We have no time to lose in talking. Help the others aboard the boat and ready for departure. I will arrive as soon as I can. Do it quickly.’’

Barnabe took off running down the passage taking the lamp, leaving Nabi in the darkness. The troll growled in pain and rage. Nabi tried a last spell, not knowing if he had enough mana to succeed. He stretched out his arm towards the troll.

‘‘Lo Oh Ven!’’

Nothing happened. After only the second syllable, he was already out of mana. The sparks around his wrist extinguished. He needed desperately to regain his power in order to finish his spell. Nabi closed his eyes to rest. He heard the rage of the troll increase as he was desperately trying to free his foot. A minute passed and he opened his eyes to see the troll lift the stone block as if it was weightless. Nabi tried to finish his spell… Still nothing, it wasn't enough. He saw no sparks around his wrists. He closed his eyes and prayed to God.

‘‘Oh God almighty, are you calling me back to you? Have I finally completed the task that you have assigned me?’’

Nabi reopened his eyes. The troll was slowly approaching him and limping, holding the stone over his head and was within ten feet of Nabi who tried to cast one last time.

‘‘… Ven.’’

The green cloud he had hoped for finally emerged out of his palm and enveloped the head of the troll. It flared his nostrils and took two deep breathes. The troll inhaled the nauseating green fog. It eyes closed and it slowly collapsing on his knees. It swiveled his head and gave Nabi a furious glare. It moaned and breathed hard. Unable to hold the stone block any longer, it crumpled to the ground.

‘‘Thank you God.’’

Nabi turned heel and went down the dark passage as fast as possible. With his staff, he hobbled along the long corridor. He was tired from the effort expended by his magic. Painfully, climbing the stairs that rose to the chapel, he heard the voices of the escapees, organizing their flight to survive. Behind the chapel, he saw that almost everyone had already boarded the boat. Barnabe was watching anxious for his arrival, was reassured when at last he saw Nabi emerged from the underground.

‘‘Bravo father Nabi. You have saved us all. You were right; we have all succeeded to flee. ’’

‘‘Not all Barnabe, unfortunately not all. There were some who did not escape this terrible nightmare.’’

‘‘Yes father Nabi, may God save and protect their souls.’’

‘‘At last, let’s secure those whom remain. Barnabe, begin to unmourned each side of the boat.’’

Nabi saw the faces of people on the bridge. They were frozen in fear. He heard terrible screams from behind him that made him jump. Dark shadows lumbered across the ground in their direction. They had been targeted.

‘‘Quickly Barnabe! Somebody should warn Simon. Tell him to supervise the casting off. If not, we'll never leave.’’

‘‘I am sorry to tell you that Mr. Simon is no longer with us.’’ Florence answered sadly. ‘‘He volunteered himself to make sure the door was closed to insure we escaped. I have not seen him since.’’

‘‘I will take care of the front.’’ Said Barnabe.

Florence couldn’t hold her emotions and burst into tears. Nabi glanced at the shore to see how many monsters had arrived. He counted six.

‘‘This is not the time to cry over lost souls Florence. Find somebody to weigh anchor quickly. Time is crucial.’’

There were many parcels and packages of all sizes and there were barrels attached to the main piers of the bridge.

‘‘What is in those barrels?’’ Asked Nabi.

‘‘They are food that you send monthly to the poor families in the village of Bibodu father.’’ Said Barnabe. ‘‘The boat was scheduled to leave early the next morning.’’

Nabi read the labels and one of them caught his attention; vegetable oil, it read.

‘‘Quickly detach that one!’’

‘‘Sir, the mooring cable holding is too tight. We are unable to detach it.’’ said Florence with an anxious voice.

The boat was freed at the front, by the flow of the current; the bow was floating gently away from the dock. The mooring cable at the back of the boat was snagged and had retightened.
‘‘Cut it if you must, but hurry up. Barnabe, bring the boarding gangway to stop the monsters from coming aboard. You! ’’ Nabi asked the two men beside him. Help me to throw this barrel overboard.’’

The gangway was retracted just before two trolls arrived at the dock. They tried to find another way to board the boat. With pain and suffering, Nabi and his helpers, weren’t able to lift the barrel of one hundred fifty pounds. Even with tree people, it proved very challenging.

‘‘That’s it father Nabi, the mooring cable has been cut.’’ said Florence.

The boat finally glided out of the dock. The boat was overloaded and was moving too slowly. Even the current of the river was not strong enough to immediately get them out of the danger. Seeing the boat getting away, the monsters became very aggressive and tried desperately to grip the railing and climb aboard.

‘‘Throw things at them, anything. Stop them from boarding.’’ Yelled Nabi.

Wooden crates were flung in the air at the trolls and they lost their grip. Nabi and his helpers were unable to lift the heavy barrel high enough to place it on the railing.

‘‘Please, step aside, Sir. I will take care of it.’’ Said a voice.

A young blond man well-built and smiling was standing behind Nabi. He stepped back to give him room. With his help, it was easy to put the barrel in place. The four other trolls had arrived on the dock.

‘‘Very good my boy, now throw it forcefully on the dock.’’

As soon as he said it, it was done. The wooded barrel shattered into pieces, spreading the dock in oil. When the four trolls tried to stand, they started dancing bizarrely. They tried to keep their balance but fell and coating them in oil. The spectacle amazed the escapees on the boat

‘‘What's your name young man?’’ Asked Nabi smiling and pleased.

‘‘Jean, Sir... Jean. I am a sailor on your boat, Sir.’’

‘‘Very well Jean, you just saved the boat and all of us aboard.’’

Suddenly an oil coated troll got up and threw himself at the boat. Since the boat was not far from the shore, it succeeded in barely grasping the railing. It saw Nabi through the railing’s bars and let loose with an angry scream. Nabi hit it on the head with his staff. The beast lost his grip and fell on the back on the dock. The risk of the others imitating their leader caused him to fear for the worst. In one rapid movement, Nabi grabbed the lamp from Florence’s hands and threw it on the oiled dock that burst into flames. The trolls were soaked in oil caught fire and burnt like living torches. They lit up in a blinding light. They were contorting in pain. The trolls were unable to swim so they were afraid of the water, but one of them jumped in anyways. The fire was extinguished immediately, but the troll trashed and flailed. He tried to keep his head above water but he drowned anyways.

‘‘Jean, my boy, where is the captain of the boat?’’

‘‘I do not know Sir. I have not seen Captain De Lacroix since yesterday evening.’’

‘‘Do you know how to operate this vessel?’’

‘‘Absolutely Sir!’’ Jean replied in an excited voice. Captain De Lacroix frequently left me in charge at the helm.’’

‘‘Excellent! Jean, I appoint you captain. Take the helm skipper.’’

‘‘Thank you, Sir.’’

‘‘Barnabe! Go to the bow and guide him.’’

‘‘Very well Sir!’’

Nabi slowly headed to the back of the boat. Jean climbed the rear deck and thanked the person at the helm and proudly took his place.

‘‘Captain, I'm very tired.’’ said Nabi. ‘‘I'm going to rest for a bit. Wake me up if there is any problem.’’

‘‘Yes, Sir. You can count on me.’’ Said Jean with a broad smile.

The exhausted old man went into the cabin and he threw himself on the bed. He closed his eyes and fell into an uneasy sleep.

Unknown to them, the two last trolls were still dry on the side of the dock, became wary and avoided the obstacle of fire. They started running across the ground towards the front of the boat, trying to catch him.

A little while later, Nabi was awakened by screams on the deck. He quickly grabbed his staff and exited the cabin. Nabi saw the look of fear painted on Jean’s face. He was staring at something over Nabi’s shoulder. He spun around and saw a troll armed with a stick that had succeeded in getting on the boat’s deck. At this point, the river had narrowed and big trees grew along both shores their roots jutted out of the water. Tree’s trunks were almost upon of the boat as it went by. It was apparent that the troll had simply walked across the tree trunks to sneak on board, though Nabi. The troll picked up a wood crate and launched it in the air, narrowly missing Barnabe. It smashed against the railing and fell into the river.

‘‘Barnabe! Take the helm.’’ Yelled Jean.

All the crew was frightened and running all over. Nabi positioned himself to have an unobstructed view of the troll and made sure nobody was behind the monster. He needed to aim precisely.

‘‘Lo Ful Ir.’’

Nabi shot a fireball with full force that hit the monster on its right shoulder and face. The troll absorbed the attack and gave Nabi a furious glare. It roared and showed him his toothless mouth. Nabi had hurt him but it didn’t stop him. Jean picked up a little barrel that Nabi knew was filled with olive oil. He stopped him from throwing it.

‘‘No Jean, not this time my boy. It would destroy the boat.’’

Jean put down the barrel as Nabi started to cast.

‘‘- Lo... ’’

His mana was nearly exhausted. Nabi could only cast the first part of the spell before the sparks disappear. They were all in a tough situation. Outnumbering the troll but inexperienced against such an abomination. Two people grabbed long poles hook as lances against the monster. These sticks were too weak and broke too easily when they tried to puncture the thick skin. Jean took a little chest that was fairly heavy and painfully climbed the stairs leading to the top of the cabin, on the side that Nabi was standing still and the troll was advancing and threatening towards him. Nabi blocked his first attacks with his own staff, but the second attempt makes him lose his staff and fell backwards. His staff rolled over the deck. The monster raised his club and Nabi tried to get his staff but the beast stepped on it. Nabi closed his eyes and clenched his teeth. The noise of a chest smashing made him reopen his eyes. The troll was lying unconscious beside him. Jean was standing on top of the cabin and smiling.

With the help of Jean, they put the dead body of top over the gangway, preparing to throw it in the water. All of a sudden, the troll regained consciousness, grabbed Nabi’s arm, and dragged him downwards. Nabi hit his head on the hull of the boat just before he fell into the river. A little dizzy, he clung on to his staff. Before he could call out for help, something grabbed his legs and pulled him down. In the middle of the night and underwater, he could not see it but could easily figure out what was it. The troll couldn’t swim, so it instinctively grabbed him to survive. He freed his legs and started kicking in order to escape but he was unable break free. The beast was now holding him firmly by the shoulders. Nabi was unable to rise to the surface and began to panic. He struck him repeatedly with his staff but the old man was still trapped. Struggling frantically with his legs, he was finally able to surface and catch his breath. He hit the troll on the top of the head. The beast let go and Nabi broke free. The current dragged both of them and they were unable to grasp anything to slow them down. Nabi saw for a split second the boat was going faster than he was and out of reach. The troll head surfaced and when he saw the man, it grabbed him by the shoulders and started drowning him again. Nabi gripped his staff and hit it in the stomach until it let go. A strong wave engulfed them. They were caught in a whirlpool. Nabi felt a tearing pain in his back. He had hit a big rock at full force and cut his skin. Holding his staff in one hand, he tried to gripping to this rock. The troll also resurfaced and grip on the same rock. Very upset, the troll tried to position himself on more stable ground before the man. Exhausted, Nabi’s heart was beating furiously. He flailed his staff at the troll, unable to make him let go. Finally, Nabi struck the troll on the head twice, causing the troll to slip into the troubled waters. The current carried it away and engulfed it in the whirlpool. Nabi saw it struggling for a moment and saw it disappear in the depth.

Dawn broke the first rays of the sun peaked over the trees. The water was icy cold soaking the body of the old man who lost his way and battered by the current. Trying to hold his head above water, he sought desperately to find something to cling on. He saw a rock out cropping near the shore on the left. He swam weakly towards it. Half dead, completely exhausted and frozen, the next few minutes were painful. The terrible shock from when he hit those rocks. Nabi clung on without moving for a while. He felt it was a good time to try again. With great difficulty, not even knowing how he managed to crawl onto the outcropping and passed out.
***
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 17-Sep-18 22:58

Hi Clodius… I think that it is an excellent start and can't wait until they are all done. I know it is hard to translate your feelings from French to English so the work is pretty good, it is coming along quite well. I hope others had the time to read it. Let me know when you have first 4 chapters converted.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 19-Sep-18 18:02

Hi CS, yes, the progress in French is going faster than the translation. I did not touch chapter 4 for long and even if I screened it before I post it, I found more things to add. That is why I call it a draft. Now, I realized that I need to describe more the secondary characters. Not much is translated but now the first four chapters are done.
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Clodius_one » 21-Sep-18 02:37

This week I played with one of our villains; the blue monster Trolin. I tried to complete the views that was not drew by the creator. Have a look in my cloud and tell me what you think.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/100604938@N06/
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Re: French DM Novel

Post by Chaos-Shaman » 21-Sep-18 21:54

You are not deviating too much from the original, and since you are using the champions as the possible party that it is an excellent job. The Trolin graphics are wonderful, might add another shot of it holding the club for animation.
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