Dungeon Master Forum

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter.

It's not a joke, although I wish it was.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1611224/

I found a trailer for this movie reading a blog of one of my favorite local webcomic artists (http://www.wayfarersmoon.com, totally amazing high fantasy). I thought it was a joke, as it *was* April 1st when I read this, so I typed "abraham lincoln vampire hunter wtf" into Google. Apparently I wasnt the only one who thought WTF!?, as it pulled up almost 200k hits!

From what I gather of the plot, Abraham Lincoln (who in the movie is a hot young man, instead of the gangly and admittedly unattractive real Abe) finds out that there are vampires who are anti-abolitionist because they are using slaves for food, and they have a lot of political power and are instigating the Civil War trying to keep slavery legal. (For those of you non-Americans who slept through world history like I did, one of the main, but not only (like the movie claims), factors of the US civil war is that the Southern US states economy was slave-labor driven. So when Lincoln tried to free the slaves, the South US tried so secede and make their own nation so they could keep the black people enslaved. Lovely concept, eh?) So Abe starts kickin' butt and takin' names, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon style. Literally. In the trailer theres a scene where ol' Abe has his top hat and tails and is whipping an axe around like a nunchaku(with the appropriate whoosh woosh sound effects) and slicing through trees in a single blow. Also running up a pole and kicking off it while simulaniously slaughtering vampires. Yeah. That comes to mind when I think Abe Lincoln.

Oh, and its directed by Tim Burton too.

*facepalm*.

Personally, for you English on here I think they need to make Winston Churchill, Nazi-Killing Ninja.

There was actually a Churchill spoof film like that which had him as a young action hero, I beleive a British film but they deliberately had the American Christian Slater play Churchill. Sadly I don't recall it being any good at all, in fact my friend wanted to walk out half way through.

Is it bad that I actually would like to see this? His story about freeing the slaves is good and all, I just always felt it was missing vampires.

There's a book already about the vampire-hunting Abraham Lincoln. I think it's a graphic novel but I can't remember - we were selling it at work maybe a year ago. I think it's in a similar line to "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" (or was it "Sense ans Sensbility", I can't remember...Austen with zombies anyway) which also had a graphic novel. There's a couple of other famous classics redone with monsters in too, but I can't remember which ones now...

Edit - Just as I pushed the "Post" button I remembered one is "Android Karenina". There's another one relating to a sea monster or something too, though.

oh_brother wrote:I just always felt it was missing vampires.

... and Martians.

beowuuf wrote:There was actually a Churchill spoof film like that which had him as a young action hero, I beleive a British film but they deliberately had the American Christian Slater play Churchill. Sadly I don't recall it being any good at all, in fact my friend wanted to walk out half way through.

Gee, I wonder why a Churchill spoof with Christian Slater in it wasnt any good? WTF, I don't look at Christian Slater and think 'Churchill'. And besides, if I was British, I'd be annoyed that they got some smarmy American (not even a great actor!) to play a national hero. I mean, you guys have plenty of good young actors, why not use one of them?

Actually that was the joke, it was a British film but it was poking fun at the Americanising of history. So having an American actor being the lead, having Churchill be an action hero, etc. Christian Slater was fine in the lead, and the idea should have worked...it just...didn't. Don'#t recall why exactly. Perhaps it just relied too heavily on the premise, and forgot that spoofing bad action films/historical stuff by being bad is a bit or a thin joke. Who knows, maybe I just wasn't in the mood for it at the time or something

Ameena wrote:
Edit - Just as I pushed the "Post" button I remembered one is "Android Karenina". There's another one relating to a sea monster or something too, though.

It's Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters, if I remember correctly. I guess that makes sense, but the Abe Lincoln one isnt as well known as the Pride and Prejudice and Zombies one, so most people go WTF is this!? Now, if they had made the zombie one, most people would know what was going on and I think the WTF factor would be way lower.

Ahh, Sense and Sensibility, that's it, yeah...I only know these 'cause we sell 'em at work - I've never read any of 'em or anything.

These books are generally un-readable. I guess some elderly women might enjoy reading them but I can't read them without turning my brain OFF or damaging it irreversibly. I tried "Pride and prejudice" as recommended literature at hight school and after about a hunder *facepalms*, *mehs* and *zzzzzs* I gave up on page 70 or so.

And I do enjoy old(er) English and American literature - I read many many dozens of classic English and American novels. I even read much older things like The Canterbury Tales and I enjoyed it. But not Jane Austen.

I think that was probably the point of writing the zombie/sea monster/android/vampire versions of these books - to "jazz them up" a bit and maybe make people interested in them or something, lol.